3 more days before my first paper, and i'm not really in the mood to study..... :P i did some revision, but not to the extent i have the confidence to score an A. After this entry, i'm going to mug late today.
some thoughts for today... secondary school is really different.It's not the place that matters. It's the people. It's the things we do. Although there were misunderstandings, but they would be solved instantly. No overnight grudges. People don't put on a mask. If they hate you, it's written all over their faces. If everyone's enjoying the company of each other(most of the time), you could hear the simplest laughters and see the most charming smiles. How do u define simplest laughters?....it's all from the heart, we know it....
polytechnic. A place where 90% of the people are with their masks are on. No doubt there are laughters and smiles, but they are not from the heart. Sometimes, i don't see the point in making friends with them. My first year in poly was on a high profile, making friends from everywhere in the school. Clubs, other classes, basketball courts, cafeteria....etc. Now currently 2nd year, i'm in a very low profile. Friends are very easy to make, but you don't know who and what exactly they would be.Just within one semester, i've been backstabbed at least twice.
Or perhaps, they have different backgrounds. Much more complicated backgrounds which made them so hard to understand. Or all these God wants to show me how's the world is like.
Should i just be myself, or act blur as if i'm so ignorant of everything, or go around bs-ing people? I really don't know....like the chinese saying " jian guo gui hai bu bai ye hen".....
Demanding. Another serious problem with us. We always expect more from others and hardly give. It's like asking someone to contribute some stuff in projects , but he responds with " why can't you do it? why me?". A little more appreciation is needed for us. A simple phrase such as "thank you" and less procrastinations will definitely make the place a better the place. On the other hand, i believe that it doesn't matter how much people gives, but how much u give and would that make everyone happy? IF so, why not give more and be happier?Another issue with demand(s). Not with people but especially with girls. They only know how to take and never give. Examples like asking guys to do stuff, and expect them to do them as if these extra jobs are given to them since we guys are born.
hey.....u see..... i'm procrastinating again...damn.... that's all for today folks!
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Created at 7:06 PM
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A Simple yet forgotton story. | Monday, September 12, 2005
There's always three brothers who have been constantly paying visits to us. However, they do not appear together all the times, instead, they always come to find us one after one. The eldest brother is called "Lost", followed by "Regrets" and then the youngest of them all, "Cherish".
First we would lose someone, then we will have regrets.At the end of it, we learn to cherish.
These three brothers always visit us, yet we never learn our lesson.
**i came up with this story, hope u enjoy and would be able to "re-learn" how to cherish others, and not neglecting anyone**
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Created at 8:41 PM
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things went very badly today. woke up feeling aching all over, scared myself when sandra told me flash need to put video in it and i thought i didn't do it and the due date is tomorrow, quarrelled with parents.....and some minor ones... it's been a long time since there's a misunderstanding between me and my parents. really sad abt it. story's too long for me to mention, so i just leave it here...
supposed to meet keljin at orchard today. As i was abt to leave, my parents came in to scold me for some reason and i didn't go. No mood. And i didn't want to show my ugly face and bad mood. Sry keljin!...
great.so many problems today.
after the scolding, lots of things went through my mind. Am i really that lousy? am i really in the fault of everything?
my temper-sometimes, i really wish i didn't hurled those words at you. i really didn't mean it. it's all out of emotions. Many experiements and experiences have shown i'm a emotional peron. I know what i shouldn't do, but i let my emotions controlled me....
"Verbal injuries take a lifetime or longer to be forgiven."
prone to what pple says- have been telling myself to believe in things that i have seen personally only. but at times, i do get taken in by what others say. somehow affected. i'm just so dumb to fall for those stuff.
"$%#DFGF*&*&^*&^*^*&"
procrastinations- i know what i ought to do, but i did not. Been complaining abt everything. yet no actions to amend them.
"complains and complains...."
smiles/laughers-i really forgot how to laugh/smile. it's something which it seems so easy to do when it's not. It's about truly laughing from you heart. not just those jokes and silly stuff which u encounter daily.
It's about truly laughing from you heart
confidence & determination- i'm seriously hampered by these two issues for years. Ever since after that incident occured.Where's the confidence to show the world's what i've done is right?Where's the determination to get things done when everyone believe you can't? it's all gone.....
"and these 2 issues become something called pride...."
I don't want to be looked down anymore. But neither do i want to look down on others. I just wanna show them who i really am. I'm not a kid anymore, i dont want to be treated like a small child. I want to know how to laugh and smile . I need to filter off those words which i shouldn't listen to.
Where am i? Who am i?i'm lost.
Can you answer my problems?
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Created at 12:15 AM
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yAwnZ~ | Sunday, September 11, 2005
just woke up and i started blogging right away....^^
so...yesterday was my bro's rom, the normal procedure, the right atmosphere and the right people was there. Everything was perfectly fine, and i guess all were very happy for them ya?...haha...and after the whole procedure(from welcoming the couple, to saying the vow, signing the cert,putting on the ring, cutting the cake), we had buffet at StarDus ClubHouse. The place was small, but cozy. Lots of fun there, playing ice breaker games like "Bom-Pi-Pi" which was introduced by Ben(my bro's brotherly friend) which we got to know other people, especially the gals. Of course we didn't play the game just to know gals, but to add up to the atmosphere. What's with the game? it's the forfeit that made it fun. From brownies, red bean soup to chivas(43% alcohol), all had fun eating and cheering.... but i didn't get to eat any cause i didn't get any forfeit.hehez....
after the whole thing, we left for marina bay for bowling. Had around 5 games, and it was fun!...long time since i bowled , and "practice makes perfect" comes to my skills. Cause my skills really cannot make it. All the games were below 100.... *sighz*. But it's ok, all for the sake of having fun right?
let me wake up from my drowsiness then i decide what else to write....^^
cheer,
FM
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Created at 3:30 PM
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Profile
Name: Ah Mun/Chris Age: 19
Currently third year student of Biz-It in Singapore Polytechnic.
Planning to go SIM to further in Marketing.
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